My day as a drunk!

257844_173151136080521_100001569064996_458172_6964152_oLet me wait until you go and get your dictionary, twiddling my thumbs until you get back…OK now, look up the word “dumbass” are you there? Is there a picture there? Did you recognize ME? If you didn’t recognize it just take my word for it, that would be me! Would you like for me to tell you how I earned that title? This morning, being Sunday, I was up and getting things ready for the lunch. It is getting increasingly hard to get my mother to leave the house for any reason, even church, so this morning I didn’t even make the effort to wake her. I had a good morning of just praying as I worked and turned on Jimmy Swaggart because I love the music and when he does the preaching I love to hear him. I have to admit that if it is his son or grandson I change the channel, nothing against them but I tune in to hear Jimmy not Donnie or Gabriel! But I digress, when Donnie began to preach I turned on something my son gave me for Christmas called Apple TV and shared the music from my computer, after I had listened to my Voices of Lee music I started the “Harry Mushegan Sings” album and my dad’s voice boomed out from my television set with “No one ever cared for me like Jesus”, then “Peace in the Valley” and then “If I Can Help Somebody” began. I had my own little worship service and was feeling so good. I had put on a ham and a roast earlier and was pressuring chicken to make chicken and dumplings and cooking the broccoli for the casserole, it was all coming together, I thought. The pain in the joints of my shoulders was getting pretty severe, it comes from having abused them in my youth by trying to be Superwoman and lifting weights and things that were too heavy proving that I was as strong as my dad and my brother, well it didn’t work out any better for me than it did for them and has resulted in having cortisone shots in them both. Since I am not willing to do that again and will not take steroids into my body to try to fix it there are times that Ibuprofen in the form of Advil and prayer comes to my rescue. I opened the cabinet and looked at the Advil bottle and felt bad about putting that into my stomach; while I was thinking of that I remembered the doctor giving me something called Tramadol which is the generic for something else, I don’t remember what, and I also remembered that the doctor said it worked like Ibuprofen but didn’t harm your stomach, I decided that would be the best route to take to help me get lunch on the table. I opened the drawer and looked up at the TV, this is back before I changed the channel and turned on my music, and I saw Donnie open his Bible, I just wanted to get over there to change the channel so I opened a jar, popped one little white pill on my way to the TV. I was cutting up the pressured chicken and something caught my attention across the room… I was cutting up the pressured chicken and something caught my attention across the room, I started to walk over and thought how odd I was walking, my feet were working more like divers flippers than feet, they were just slapping down on the floor and when I stopped to try to figure it out I realized my head was spinning and my heart was beating hard in my chest. I flapped my feet which felt as if they had grown about three sizes back over to the drawer and opened it to see what I had taken thinking I was taking the advanced Ibuprofen, to my surprise it was the extra bottle I keep there of my mothers medicine which is for Alzheimer’s symptoms (can’t bring myself to say she has it, just the symptoms) in a 200mg tablet. I was astonished, I began to pray and ask God what I needed to do, the nausea I felt told me exactly what to expect in a few minutes, I panicked I knew I had to finish cooking, I couldn’t stand straight and I realized that I was drunk on that medicine. I don’t know how you feel about getting drunk, I never have because I don’t drink alcohol but after this I know it is not an experience I wanted to ever repeat. I knew my sister and my son were in church about four miles from where I was but knowing we had a guest speaker for the day I hated to disturb them and my daughter was in church fourteen miles from here, too far plus she is in charge of the children, I knew she couldn’t leave there. Finally I texted my sister and said “I need prayer, I am a jack ass and have taken mother’s meds by mistake, just pray” in a few moments she called, had walked out on the minister in front of a packed house and asked if I needed her. Thankfully my son and daughter-in-law were sitting in the room she went to make the call watching the service on the TV because there were no seats for them in the sanctuary so she shared my stupid mistake with him. I stayed on my feet because when I started to sit down I felt as if I were going to die and knowing my mother was upstairs in bed asleep I was trying to hold myself together. So, long story short, as I write to you I feel as if someone has beaten me with a bat but after sleeping from about 1:30 to 5:40 and thanks to the good care of my family, I survived. Have I learned a lesson from this? You bet your pill bottle I have, read the label folks READ the label! This is your local idiot signing off for tonight! I know my angels were busy today!

6 Replies to “My day as a drunk!”

  1. Tis not funny I know but one does laugh some times out of just sheer glee. Don’t worry you aren’t the first & will sure not be the last to do it. Just we must read the labels before we take meds. Another thing- never put someone else’s pills where you keep your own. First thing you could have done is make yourself vomit- clean it out. Benadryl is another thing you could have taken to help off set it’s attack. You can always call ER at the nearest hospital & asked for help. I have had a reaction before to a couple drugs so I understand that feeling. And as for drunk- let’s just say I wish I hadn’t done it. The worst was on cheap champagne & it took me a week to get over it. Never again believe me. I do drink a little wine with dinner two or three times a year but nothing else. That was a lesson well learned & not one I chose to repeat. You were blessed because that is a sedative & it could have caused your heart to stop. Thank the Lord for His blessing. Read, Read, Read. God bless you


  2. Sounds like something I would do. So glad you are ok. That could’ve been bad 🙂 Love u


  3. Harolene, I have had several experiences such as yours. I have more allergies than most people. I can take meds prescribed for me and they make me “drunk”.Not all, but some do. I have several bottles of meds with only one missing. That one is the one that let’s me know I can’t continue using them.


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