Maybe it’s because I was the first born, maybe it’s because at an early age I was taught that you don’t talk back you listen and if it concerns a church member you keep your mouth shut. I became the ultimate peace-maker, even at school I tried to be friends with everyone and except for the brief time when I was bullied by one of the sanctimonious church mother’s children, to see me you would have thought I was a happy little mother’s helper, teacher’s pet, best friend to all no matter who they were and the person who sometimes cried herself to sleep at night because the little helper wasn’t happy with herself. I don’t know if any of those things were right, wrong or indifferent it is the way it was. If someone was an underdog I was their Don Quixote fighting the dragons for them, thing was I didn’t fight them for myself. I have had loss in my life, close family, friends, my parents whom I loved more than life and the love of my life. Last week I asked God for a favor and if you are going to judge me for this I ask you to please delete this from your page, go no further, ok are you still here? Then I will continue. I needed to know something, I needed a physical sign that someone that is in heaven could hear me and would let me know it. I prayed and asked God to allow me to be Gideon and put out a fleece and I did lay it before Him. Within two hours, at a time I was not expecting it, I got that answer, physically got the answer and I have thanked God for it every moment I can since last Monday around noon, when it happened. So I am feeling validated right now!
There comes a time when you have to care about your insides, God gave us this Temple and we are responsible for the health and upkeep of it. I went and had a physical, all is well, went today to have my eyes examined and found that they are not aging, and except for a slight problem in my right eye for which I wear one contact, my sight is perfect, the health is perfect and the doctor told me I had the brightest smile he had ever seen and I could be proud for what good health I seemed to be in. Just wow, I was very happy about that. I think my maker might just be happy with me, validated again!
Tonight we were going to have a family prayer, my two children and their spouses, my grandson and me, so we gathered around the table and I took my Bible and just randomly opened it knowing that God was going to show me what I needed to see, it opened to the first chapter of Jeremiah, perfect, it said exactly what we needed to hear, another prayer is being answered, again God gave me what I needed!
I have always tried to the best of my ability to please everyone, whether or not I was pleased and don’t get me wrong I am not complaining, just saying I realized tonight that I could identify with the Apostle Paul when he wrote his first letter to the Corinthians. I’m figuring that since he was a great man I must have done something right after all, so I am going to go to bed tonight and be happy. Have I made some people unhappy lately? That would be yes, but I have given my life to God and I expect Him to show me the good and acceptable way to go. Here is an excerpt from the letter from Paul and I could put my name in everywhere he refers to himself, and hey, I think that’s a good thing. Read it and see if you can say the same!
1 Corinthians 9:19-23 The Message (MSG) Even though I am free of the demands and expectations of everyone, I have voluntarily become a servant to any and all in order to reach a wide range of people: religious, nonreligious, meticulous moralists, loose-living immoralists, the defeated, the demoralized—whoever. I didn’t take on their way of life. I kept my bearings in Christ—but I entered their world and tried to experience things from their point of view. I’ve become just about every sort of servant there is in my attempts to lead those I meet into a God-saved life. I did all this because of the Message. I didn’t just want to talk about it; I wanted to be in on it!