Walk a Mile in My Shoes

I think it is natural for us to want to discuss things with our friends. We bare our heart and our deepest secrets, and then say four words “what do you think?”  We have just opened the floor or given permission to people outside of our problem to give their opinions and we hear it from all angles, things you never thought of, motives assigned to your (mate, friend), motives that they may have never thought of! Do you remember the old song “Walk a mile in my shoes“? This means that unless a person has gone through exactly the same thing you are experiencing, there is no real way they can identify with it, and even if they have faced the same type problem, the people involved are going to have different personalities or points of view and there is no way it is going to be exactly the same. All you will get is more confused, because everyone seems so sure that their solution is the right one and suddenly you are turning in circles not knowing which end is up! I wrote a note to a dear friend of mine this evening, he is facing a horrific problem. My words to him were “There’s no way to say “I know how you feel”, empty words, all empty. The only thing that actually counts is “I’m praying for you”, nothing else will do, sick to my stomach“. When you tell someone you “know how they feel” remember, unless you have walked in their shoes, that is not possible. When you are in trouble or have a problem, don’t go to every one of your friends and ask that question, pick one person that you know is a praying person, maybe someone out of your immediate circle that will have no prejudice concerning the people involved. You also run the risk of being repeated over and over again, the more people you tell the more gets told, even when you say “Please don’t tell” everyone has a “best friend” someone they trust completely, who in turn has a best friend and on it goes. In crisis, the first step is to take your burden to the Lord and leave it there! Look in the Bible, go to the concordance, search for a key word that best describes how you feel and see what scriptures are listed, then look them up! When we go through periods of deep distress, it is wise, in fact it is biblical not to surround ourselves with people no matter how well meaning they might be. Solitude is essential. Silence is necessary. Words from others will distract. Stay in the Lord’s presence and see His mind during this painful time. In the soul-searching of our lives, we are to stay quiet so we can hear Him say all that He wants to say to us in our hearts! If you try to talk to someone who is hard of hearing, you have to turn down the TV or radio and make everyone get quiet because the background noise keeps them from being able to hear, it is the background noises in our life that make God’s voice obscure, so quiet that we think He is not speaking at all. Sometimes He is just telling us something that we don’t want to hear, but we need to be able to make that choice with a clear knowledge of what He is saying to us. Psalm 5:11 Let all who take refuge in You be glad!
Get alone with the Lord and see what He has to say about your situation, write down what you are hearing and read it out loud to yourself, He knows what you are facing and He can help. To find out how Jesus is able to identify with you read the book of Hebrews. God loves us all and He is speaking, are you listening?

2 Replies to “Walk a Mile in My Shoes”

  1. We can almost always “sympathize” with them…but that is much different than to “empathize” with them. And as you say, even if you have been thru a ‘similar’ situation, it is Never the SAME situation…
    When I am asked that question, I answer with more questions, trying to get them to reflect on some aspect(s) that may help them think deeper on some matters…and then just ask what I can do for them or with them…in addition to prayer, of course. But I will NEVER ‘tell them what to do’ nor make a decision for them… Especially considering that if my ‘suggestion’ goes Wrong…then I will get BLAMED for RUINING Their LIFE! (And ruining our friendship…)

    Liked by 1 person

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