When a person asks you to “tell the truth” about something that concerns them, it isn’t the truth they are seeking, it’s a confirmation that what they are doing is the right thing to do! I often find myself in the situation of listening, and the struggle in my mind is this, if I tell them the truth and they do what ever it is I have advised them against, then they will be angry with me and I will possibly lose their friendship! There are times when we let others put a guilt trip on us, why you are willing to accept their judgment as the truth without examining it for yourself? Guilt never travels alone he always brings shame along with him so you get a double whammy! We all know right from wrong and if you are really wrong you know it so I’m not talking about being guilt free in the case of an outright horrible deed, I am speaking of the guilt we feel when a person isn’t pleased with us for whatever reason. This is one thing I have had to deal with, I grew up trying to please everyone around me and when it didn’t happen I always thought it had to be something wrong with me. If I could take back all the extra things I would do, or favors I did for anyone who asked, being nice to people who were not nice to me, I would do it, but it isn’t possible. The only way I can make it count is to tell you to 1. Make sure you are right in the eyes of God, and 2. Please yourself first. When you are on a flight the attendant will tell you that in case of an emergency to put the oxygen mask that comes down on yourself first and then your child, why is that? Because if you don’t take care of yourself and you become incapacitated then you and your child are both in danger, that makes sense doesn’t it? I realized a long time ago that I couldn’t be perfect and everyone was not going to like me, yes as hard as that is to believe that about sweet, lovable me, it’s true. After all we know that Jesus was actually perfect and yet a lot of people were displeased with Him, so displeased that they hung Him on a cross to die! He was so perfect that as He was dying He asked His Father to forgive those people because they didn’t know what they were doing, or to whom they were doing it. Well no doubt I haven’t gotten that far as yet, I still get fierce feelings about people that I know are being conniving, or who manipulate people while getting by like a rat in a cheese factory, but that is my cross to bear, right?
Is there a solution to the matter? First thing is to forgive yourself for not being the perfect Ken or Barbie doll you wish you were, forgive yourself for not having the diplomacy of Dale Carnegie, or the smarts and wisdom of Solomon or Dr. Phil, for not being the perfect mate like Ward and June Cleaver or the perfect dad like Father Knows Best, you are a simple human but so is everyone else.
Lamentations 3:22-23 Through the LORD’s mercies we are not consumed, Because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.
We get a fresh start every day because His mercies are new every morning, and I know that God loves me just the way I am.