A few years ago I was in the kitchen cooking, preparing supper for 10 people when I heard an exclamation from my young grandson saying, “Oh NO, I spilled my tea!” I started gathering a cloth to go and clean it up, hoping it hadn’t landed on the carpet.
The events of the next few moments are a blur, as according to him the entire unfortunate event somehow became my fault! It ended with his mom saying she would call his dad so that he could have a “talk” with him, which he seemed to think would not happen! Suddenly as the call was being made I was summoned…”Mammy can you come here?” “Sure baby, what is it?” He put his little hands on both sides of my face as I leaned down to his level and he whispered, “I accept your apology“, I didn’t want to laugh out loud, but it was a struggle! His mom said, “What did you say?” He was caught! He was supposed to tell me he was “sorry”. It was very hard for those words to cross his lips and was something the two of them had already had the “talk” about.
Then he tried another way to get around having to say it, he asked me, “Do you know what ‘apology’ means?” “Yes”, (then from across the room) “Gabe, what were you supposed to say?” It finally happened, he squeezed out the words “I am sorry“. He looked so relieved that it was over and then asked me if I would give him a big hug! Of Course I did!
In thinking about it, I realize that “I’m sorry” are two words that are very hard for most people to say.
What is the solution?
Conduct yourself in a manner so that you never NEED to say them, which is easier said than done,
Proverbs 15:1-4 A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire. Knowledge flows like spring water from the wise; fools are leaky faucets, dripping nonsense. God doesn’t miss a thing-he’s alert to good and evil alike. A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.
The things we think of and let come out of our mouth makes up who we are.
Go back to Philippians 4:8 Finally brethren whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue, and if there is anything praiseworthy-meditate on these things.
Am I going to tell you that I am a perfect example of being constantly positive and thinking positive thoughts?
I am consistently positive, meaning that whenever I catch myself sinking into the dregs of despair I do what I heard daddy say in a sermon when I was a little girl, “I pick myself up by the ‘scruff’ of the neck haul myself to the altar and give it all to the Lord!”
I talked with a friend about the “I’m sorry” thing and he said something that made me think… “Forgiveness has to do with saying I’m sorry but that is never appropriate without finishing it off with, “Please forgive me”.
The end of the story about the forced apology is, that night my grandson was back in form with the prayer for our supper as he thanked God for His good Son Jesus, and said, “I know you would like to have more time to play with Him, Amen.”
4 Replies to “I’m sorry”
Excellent and hilarious.
However, the lesson needs to move one more step.
Saying “I’m sorry” needs to be followed by “will you please forgive me?”
This throws the ball back in their court for true reconciliation.
There’s a whole teaching on that topic that, when Biblically based, is powerful.
But I’m sure this is “old hat” to you!!!
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That’s exactly what my friend said!! I had never thought of it that way but it’s very true. It’s still hard to do. I’ll send you a private email and tell you what happened.
When I think of apology, I think of the movies. I remember when Fletch (Chevy Chase) came into the nuclear waste dump dressed up like Col. Sanders and bluffing like he was in charge of the place so that the worker bees started tripping over themselves to accommodate him. When it became apparent that he had hurt some feelings and was supposedly mistaken about the crime, he announces in a penitent voice, “Uh… It takes a big man to admit when he’s wrong… … I’m NOT a big man.”
But I also remember that scene in A Fish Called Wanda when Kevin Kline has John Cleese hanging by his heels from an upper window forcing an apology.
I’m really, really, sorry. I apologize unreservedly. I offer a complete and utter retraction. The imputation was totally without basis in fact, and was in no way fair comment, was motivated purely by malice, and I regret any distress which my comments may have caused you or your family!
But then there was this one apology they used to play on the radio between songs on KZRX when I lived in Arizona. I think it was a Damon Wayans movie.
He says, “So.. . You think you want me to apologize for all the mean and hurtful little tings I dun. Okay. I sorry you just a little turd dat can’t hold your liquid while in public! Now Why don’t you get on outa my face befo I pick you up and toss you out dat window.
(I have to apologize a lot)
Your story reminds me of two stories. One confessional on my part and the other a lot harder to hear.
I will just tell the one.
One of my favorite preachers when I was a kid was Jim McGuiggan. He once told of a time he had to catch a flight. Probably from Ireland (his real home) to the US where he worked for many years in a seminary. Long flight.
Anyway, he got his ticket and boarding pass and the assigned seat said D2. This should be quite simple. He had made the trip many times. It would be absolutely routine.
Until he got to D2 and there was a man sitting there already.
Jim politely asked the man to give up the seat. “I’m sorry, sir, but you seem to have my seat. I need to trade with you.”
The man was pleasant enough, but refused. He told Jim, “Ah… just take that one there. It’ll be fine.”
Jim insisted, just as meekly as he could.
The man resisted still. “No. Just that that one. No need for me to get all my gear out and you shove all yours in and all that hassle, just you take that one, and we will all be fine.”
At this point, Jim must assert himself. But he does so just as charitably as he can. “Oh, kind sir, but don’t you see? if I take this seat, then someone will come along shortly and ask me to move, and then I will be back asking you to move and it will just be this big thing and if you would just let me have my seat, it will all be over. Don’t you see, sir?”
By this time, the other man is getting a bit hot under the collar. “Come on, man! Just take that seat. It will all work out. I don’t wanna move. I’m all settled in. Don’t YOU see!?!”
But, Jim just could not let this go. He was right. It was bound to be a domino effect of problems, and so he persisted.
Then the man in his seat gave in, but not without loudly and angrily barking about it every step of the way. He unloaded his gear from the overhead and from under his seat. He pushed past the person in the aisle seat. Made a huge production out of the inconvenience of it all. Huffed and puffed and jammed his gear in the next compartment. He loudly complained to anyone and everyone getting on the plain as they went by.
Meanwhile, Jim sheepishly and dutifully thanked the man anyway and began squatting his gear into to place.
The man in the seat behind him though just kept barking relentlessly as Jim finally got in his seat and looked down at his ticket one more time and noticed he was in the wrong seat!!!
Oh, MY GOD!!!
Jim began apologizing all over the place. “Oh, kind sir. I am so terribly sorry. I realize now that I made a terrible mistake. You were in the right seat all along, and I rousted you for no good reason. I am so, so sorry.”
Jim said the man never shut up about it the whole flight. He barked and barked and barked all the way through baggage claim to the curbside.
His story makes me sorry.
I could keep going with this. But I probably need to apologize for taking it this far…
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That’s just plain funny and something that would totally happen to me. I’ve been wrong more times than I can count. I had a very good reason for writing this. I’ll share it with you sometime privately 😇 I’m sorry 🤣😂